Holy Hannah, it was as tough as I feared it would be.





I’ve been to the gym this morning. The first time after, give or take 5 weeks. Italy consumed all my energy to experience it to the fullest, and then I became ill with a kidney infection. The first week I could barely walk, every step hurt so much. Second week I got the antibiotics, and I felt better day by day. So this week, I wanted to start rowing again in my she-shed. A good intro for Saturday I thought.

Eventually it was, just to see how out of shape I have gotten. I wanted to start rowing on the same level I ended 5 weeks ago. Well…….

That was a big fat slap in the face. It almost felt like a high level training preparation for the Olympics. After two minutes, sweat jumped out of my pores as if the building was on fire, the pressure that had built up inside my head to keep up the pace, evoked a seizure, and my breathing was more like gasping for air as if I almost drowned only minutes ago.

I pulled myself up back in the seat, and put my feet between the loose straps again. WTF??!! I became so angry at myself. What kind of idiocrasy is this? I should be able to row at this pace with ease. 5 Weeks ago, I did this as a relaxing row for 20 minutes. I started rowing again, but turned the timer off. ‘Okay’, I thought, ‘just row slowly, find the pace that feels good for now’.

I rowed the next ten minutes in a veeeeeeeeeery slow pace, and still my breathing was through the roof. After my second seizure, it was time to quit. I stayed on the ground, catching my breath. Everything was spinning around. I slowly got up, and looked at myself in the mirror. My sweat was lying on my skin as if it was covered with blisters. And my face……

Well let me just say, that I’ve looked prettier during exercise.




It was good to start again, especially because other parts of my body started to hurt again after the 5 week break. I needed to start again, it’s my physical therapy.  But it did made me dread to go to the gym today. I was so very disappointed with my body. All the gains I made, were gone. I lost muscle mass, definition, strength, and most of all, my endurance.

But! ….. I’m in this to better myself, getting stronger mentally and physically. Mentally I got bitch slapped, but I am a tough cookie, so chin up, chesticles up, back straight…. And secretly flex in the mirror when nobody’s looking. It will get better again.

Anyway, even though it was tough, it was really nice to be back again. And the strangest thing happened again; the happy feeling of muscle soreness.